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Monday 2 May 2011

The Dos And Donts Of Computer Dating

Online dating can be a great way to meet people who are compatible with your interests. It can allow non-threatening introductions, and let you meet lots of others. Sometimes it develops long term relationships.

While computer dating is very popular and generally safe, you should take some precautions. Dating is, by definition, a personal thing, and you should be cautious about giving out personal information online.


Choosing a reputable service is the first step you’ll want to take. Talk to friends about sites they’ve had good experiences with. See if any of the couples you know met online.

It’s also important to check out the reviews of online dating services. You won’t want to make a judgment from one review. But if you keep reading the same complaints over and over, you’ll likely want to avoid the site.

One of the great benefits of computer dating is that you can meet people from all over that have the same interests that you have. If you have an unusual hobby, you can specify that in your profile. If you want to meet others of the same faith, you can join sites especially for your faith.

After you choose a site and post a profile, you may have people request a contact. You may see others you’d like to meet. Just take it very slowly at first. Initiate a conversation, but keep your information anonymous.

You should have lots of online conversations before you set up a face-to-face meeting. Be very discriminating about continuing relationships. If there are any red flags, you’ll want to proceed very cautiously or end the relationship before meeting. You don’t need to invite excess drama into your life, and you want to stay safe.

Set realistic expectations about the people you meet. You are likely going to date several people who don’t work out. Statistics tell us that many of those you meet will be people you never want to see again. Others won’t want to see you again!

Don’t be discouraged if things don’t work out. Recognize that part of the experience is the journey. You’re meeting people and finding out what works for you and what doesn’t. If the next person has the same qualities you liked in the first, but likes you, too, you’re onto something.

It’s best to be reasonable about long distance relationships from the beginning. Are you willing to commit to flying across the country every week? Driving 50 miles and back several times a week? It can be done, but be sure you are really prepared to make that commitment.

Take it slowly. Sometimes we think we know someone because we’ve connected online, but we don’t really know him or her at that point. Don’t agree to something unwise, like going on a cruise with someone you’ve never met.

Be yourself. Online dating is not the place to present a new you or try to reinvent who you are. It’s the time to find someone with whom the real you can connect over the long term.

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